The Cost of Becoming Someone New
We spend so much of life asking what we need to add. Rarely do we ask this instead. What are you carrying that no longer belongs to you?
Hey friends,
The other day I found an old photo of myself. Basketball shorts that were way too big. A shaved head. A grin that could only belong to someone who believed they had life completely figured out.
I laughed.
Then I sat there a little longer than I expected. Not because I missed being younger. But because I remembered how badly that version of me wanted what I have today.
He wanted to play professionally. He wanted to build something meaningful. He wanted a family. He wanted to make a difference.
He just didn’t know what it would cost.
📖 One Story
When we’re young, we think becoming someone new is about adding things.
More confidence. More success. More money. More strength. More opportunities. More freedom.
Life has taught me something different.
Most of becoming has actually looked like letting go.
Letting go of the need to prove myself. Letting go of chasing everyone else’s definition of success. Letting go of relationships that only worked because I stayed small. Letting go of always saying yes. Letting go of pretending I had everything figured out.
Some of those things were exciting to leave behind.
Others felt like grief. Nobody really talks about that part. Every new season asks something from us. Marriage asked me to stop thinking only about myself. Losing my parents asked me to stop believing there would always be more time.
Starting ALLSMITH asked me to leave behind comfort, certainty, and the identity I’d spent years building.
None of those chapters simply gave me something new. They first asked me to release something old. Looking back, I don’t think growth has been about becoming someone else.
It’s been about slowly uncovering the person I was always meant to become.
💡 One Reflection
Maybe you’ve felt this too. Maybe the hardest part of your next chapter isn’t learning something new. Maybe it’s having the courage to leave behind something familiar.
A routine that’s no longer serving you. A story you’ve been telling yourself.
The version of you that keeps apologizing for taking up space. The resentment you’ve been carrying for years. The need to have everyone understand your decisions.
It’s strange.
We spend so much of life asking,
“What do I need to add?”
Very rarely do we ask,
“What am I carrying that no longer belongs?”
Maybe that’s why change feels heavy.
Not because we’re moving forward. Because we’re trying to drag yesterday with us.
🎯 One Invitation
This week, I want you to notice one thing.
Not what you need to accomplish.
Not another habit to build.
Not another goal to chase.
Instead, ask yourself this:
What version of me is asking to be left behind?
Don’t rush the answer.
You probably already know.
Maybe it’s fear.
Maybe it’s perfectionism.
Maybe it’s people-pleasing.
Maybe it’s waiting for permission.
Maybe it’s believing you’re too old, too late, or too far gone.
Whatever comes up…
Thank it.
It helped you survive a season of your life. But surviving and living aren’t the same thing.
Some versions of ourselves are only meant to carry us for a little while.
“You don’t have to hate who you were to become who you’re becoming.”
Sometimes the most loving thing we can do is thank an old version of ourselves for getting us this far…
…and gently let them rest.
Until next time,
Bryce
Keep Seeking Edges!